The Garden of Wedding Dresses

So on Sunday I went wedding dress shopping.

I wasn't buying; one of my reporters who is getting married in August was, so don't panic that you've missed some major announcement in my life. You most definitely have not.

We went to this appointment only place called The Bridal Garden, wherein rich people have donated their old dresses and they are resold. The profit (it's a non-profit bridal dress shop) goes to support New York City school children. Or at least that is what is claimed.

I thought the address sounded familiar (and the doorman looked familiar, actually). But it wasn't until I got off the elevator and saw the paint job in the hallway that I realized that a few floors down was where my friend Steven has his offices. That was a little disconcerting.

But not nearly as disconcerting as the mad house INSIDE the Bridal Garden. They had way overbooked the day and let someone in who did not have an appointment. So my friend had to start changing behind a screen in the main room that did not really cover her. Also the window were behind her and there were no blinds on the. Granted, we were on the ninth floor, but still, there were lots of buildings around us with nine floors as well. I'll cut to the chase and tell you that my friend tried on seven or eight dresses, but didn't find anything she really liked. More disappointing to her was the complete lack of attention paid to her by the staff. She was looking forward to some advice from someone who knows what they're doing, as opposed to me going, "The waist on that dress looks a little funny."

While all of this was going on, the drama playing out beside me was as follows:

Bride-to-be #1: Looked like a little doll. She had a dress that looked like she should be on top of a cake. However, she had come with her fiance, who the shop made wait outside in the hallway. Every time she wanted his opinion, they would have to go get him. She wound up buying the dress.

Bride-to-be #2: Came out with them most stunning dresses I had ever seen. The first one she tried on, I fell in love with and after she put it back on the rack, I seriously considered buying it, even though I have no wedding planned in the near future and no hope of one. Each subsequent dress (except for one - a halter top that fit weird) was more amazing than the last. She had her mother with her, who was very southern and I had a weird flashback to the process when a high school friend got married. She did not buy a dress.

Bride-to-be #3: Getting married in six weeks. Bought the most hideous dress I could imagine. It looked like someone's grandmother's "good" tablecloth, but sparkle-y. She was loud (didn't have an appointment), tried on 30 dresses (NO LIE), called everyone she knew to tell them about the dress. Took pictures with her camera phone and sent it to everyone. Discussed ad nauseam how, "I think I love this dress!" Told us several times in a normal speaking voice - because she had lowered her voice from loud to normal as if imparting a secret - "and it only costs $600!" She was there with her mother, who looked exhausted and disinterested. Became a really bad stereotype when she started saying something about her rabbi. I lied to her and told her it was a great dress. But it wasn't a great dress. It was hideous.

We're doing this again in June. I hope she finds a dress soon. I don't know how many of these other brides I can put up with.