Ok, so NOT employed

I wound up turning down that job, but between moving and my mom being in the hospital, I haven't really had time to write about it. Maybe next week? Stay tuned.

Employed (and not too happy about it)

I have a job. I got a call this morning — it woke me up, actually — offering me the job and I've been crying about it ever since. I can be emotional at odd times. I cannot, for the life of me, cry at a funeral. Then randomly, at the wedding of a complete stranger, tears. Also, annoyingly, I cry when I'm super pissed off. But that is neither here nor there.

I'm heartbroken because choosing this job means I have to give up my relationship of five months. Five months — just long enough to really like someone, start to get comfortable with them, accept their annoying habits and focus on the positive attributes, start to depend on their company, etc. NOT long enough to fall in love and move to a new city with them because THEY got a job in Charlotte, N.C. Charlotte, N.C. — just far enough away NOT to be able to drive there for a weekend visit, just close enough to feel like you should be able to. I wish Amtrack and JetBlue did Frequent Buyer Cards, like coffee shops do: Buy 9 trips, get the 10th for free.

Five months is long enough to spend an entire day agonizing over the decision on what to do until your brother sends you a text message that says, "What are you? Stupid? You can't give up a job just to move to a city with a guy. What if you break up in a month? Then you have no job and no boyfriend." So I called up the HR person and accepted the job to her voicemail. Then I hung up and started crying again. I pretty sure I'm not in love, but I can't tell any more.

He said, "Everything just feels like bad timing." And I couldn't agree more.

The Job Interview

I'm not sure what it is about New York City and the marathon job interview, but I'm getting a little tired of it.

Granted, this is only my second NYC job interview, and it was nowhere near as bad as the first, but still, am I crazy to think that if you have someone in for an interview you should warn them that it make take many, many hours and that there will be no lunch break, so bring a snack or eat a hearty and late breakfast?

The job interview on Monday lasted from 11 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. The first 30-45 minutes was paperwork, which I did not know I'd be filling out, so I had none of the information like previous addresses or starting and ending salaries with me. Then I interviewed with the HR person/recruiter, followed by the director of the communications department. After that, back down stairs to take three writing sample tests (newsletter, flier, letter) and the much more rigorous Microsoft proficiency tests. There was a Word test (fine, I use Word all the time), Excel test (less fine...I only know how to manipulate data, not how to do any of the formulas) and Power Point (what the hell?!!! when do you use Power Point at newspapers!). Each of these tests had 55 questions. I was worn out by the time I got out of there. And hungry. And I needed to pee.

Since then I've heard nothing from them. And so I was just writing the job off, when I got an e-mail this afternoon from my former managing editor who told me the HR Recruiter Lady had called (he's one of my references) and he'd given a rave review of me. It also turned out they had called my immediate supervisor, though he didn't recognize the number and so didn't answer the phone. He called back, but they'd already left for the day, so he expects to talk to them tomorrow.

So now it looks like maybe I will get this job (three weeks of vacation! free healthcare! - though, not sure about the salary yet). Anyway, place your bets now. Will they offer me the job? And if so, will it be before I actually drive ALL my stuff to Mississippi, or before? My money is on Wednesday, as I'm pulling into the driveway of my brother's house.

Bad good luck

I leave tomorrow, returning to New York (via Charlotte) in order to move. I have reserved the U-Haul, had a few minor repairs and maintenance done to the truck, collected packing supplies. So, of course, first thing this morning I get a call about a job. Now I have an interview set up for 11 a.m. Monday for a job in New York City. So, what will happen is this. I will interview, they will love me, but they will wait until I've driven a U-Haul full of my crap all the way to Jackson, Mississippi, before calling to offer me the job. Then I'll have to turn around and go back to New York and find a new place to live. Even when I have good luck, I have bad luck.

In the meantime I haven't heard from the other job I interviewed for in Chicago. The more time that passes, the more I'm sure I didn't get the job. Am I so far out of the loop that I don't even know when an interview has gone well?

Unemployment Update: A few fishies decide to bite

I'm not sure where we left this, but here's some numbers:

Number of weeks unemployed:10.5
Number of applications sent out: About 60
Number of rejections: 5
Number of potential jobs I'm actively dealing with: 2

So I was reject last night for the job at the Chicago paper. Not terribly surprising. I wasn't expecting to get the job I actually wanted in this market. In the meantime, however, I've been contacted by two other places.

One is a small communications firm also in Chicago. I sent my resume in Friday afternoon and by Monday morning I had an e-mail waiting for me asking me to call the president of the firm. We had a short chat — about 30 minutes — and then she sent me a test article to write for a newsletter. We've also set up a video conference interview for tomorrow and I've filled out an employment application. The video conference is interesting. I think it's a way to do an in-person interview without actually being there in person, which saves their company a lot of money. If I can drop it in seamlessly during our interview, I think I'm going to suggest she pitch that story to the newspapers as a way of getting her company some extra press: ways companies who are hiring in this economy are using technology to save money in the process. Can't you just see the business section of a newspaper jumping all over that? Who wouldn't want to hire a creative thinker like me?!

While that was going on I also heard from a job I applied for back at the beginning of August in New York City. They said I was being considered for the writer position and to send two writing samples, which I did today.

What happens if I get two job offers and have to choose?! Obviously, this will never happen, but oh the agony if it does. And then once I take a job, of course, all the greatest jobs in the world will come tumbling along into my lap. "Oh, Bucky, please take these jobs that pay boatloads of money and require travel to exciting, international destinations while not requiring anything approaching real work at all." Sigh.

Well, it's nice to dream anyway.

Moving

Barring any job offers between now and Oct. 12, I will be moving home — either in with my parents or with my brother. Sad that a 34 year-old woman has to move home.

I'm not entirely sure it was the right decision, but after being pestered about it by my parents and boyfriend I caved in and decided to move — only to hear from my mother than she now thinks I shouldn't move. (It would be better only to move once, she now says.) Of course now it's too late. I've given my notice, paid the penalty fee of two months rent (bastards!) and they've already rented out my apartment for Oct. 15. I still have to pay half October's rent (double bastards!).

So anyway, I'll be driving back north soon to load up my U-Haul.

Hope I get a job soon!

Traveling

In the last two weeks I've been in or through the following states:

New York*
New Jersey
Pennsylvania
Ohio*
Indiana
Illinois*
Missouri
Kansas*
Maryland
West Virginia
Virginia
Tennessee*
Georgia
Alabama
Mississippi*

The asterisks are the states I've spent at least a night in.

That is a LOT of states. Before September is over, I'm likely to add Louisiana and South and North Carolina to that list. If I don't get a job, maybe I'll spend October hitting up the other 32 states — though if I go to Hawaii I may never come back again. People have got to stop moving, myself included.

Unemployment Update: The Fall of our Discontent

As we begin month three of my unemployment, I have received two more rejections (both for jobs at the U.S. Mint — times must be tough when people want jobs writing about the joys of the mint) and I have done one phone interview.

The interview was for the RedEye, which I wrote a previous entry about. I did actually call on that Friday, but the editor was off site at a meeting, so I left a message. The Monday, as I was arriving in Kansas (moving the roommate - more on this later), I received an e-mail from a Tribune company recruiter asking me to fill out a questionnaire and return it no later than Sept. 1, which was the next day. So the next morning I got up, went to the Bagel Express down the street from my now former roommate's parent's house (okay, this is getting confusing. Her name is Alice, and she will heretofore be referred to as such.) and spent a couple hours answering the following questions:

1. Why are you currently on the job market?

2. What is your current (or most recent) compensation?

3. What is your desired salary range/ requirement?

4. Current authorization to work in the US:

5. Availability for a phone screening/Best number to reach you:

6. How are you innovative? Give an example of ideas that you’ve come up at work – can be a big or small idea or a project.

7. How are you solutions-oriented? Give an example of how you navigate workplace challenges.

8. What do you think makes RedEye work as a newspaper? What could be improved?

9. List four adjectives that best describe you.

Apparently my answers were good because the next day (I think we're at Wednesday now), I got an e-mail from the editor, asking if I could do a phone interview at noon on Friday. And thus the phone interview was born. Aside from forgetting that there was an hour time difference between Chicago and New York and spending about 30 minutes in excruciating agony wondering why she wasn't calling before realizing that fact, I think the call went well. I liked what she had to say about the paper and the position and she seemed to like my answers to her questions. She had several, "I agree with what you said about..." moments. She also said they were looking for someone outside the paper, someone with a "fresh perspective," which is a point in my favor.

She also said I would hear back from her within two weeks, one way or the other. I hope its one way and not the other! This has become my dream job, ensuring that I will not get it and for sure, wind up in Little Rock.

And we pause for a moment for dumb celebrity excuse of the day

I'm not even sure I've ever seen anything Mischa Barton has done. If it weren't for People and OMG and the rest of the tabloids, I might not even know she was an "actress". So when I read that she had "broken her silence on involuntary hospitalization" the first thing I thought was, "Wait. She was in the psych ward?" I didn't even know she had been hospitalized. But thanks to Yahoo, I now know not only that but the reason why:

"Here's what happened: Before the show started, I was traveling abroad for contract stuff and I went through a terrible surgery -- a wisdom tooth surgery, all four removed. It was a nightmare," the actress explained. "I've never had surgery before -- it all went wrong and I had to have a second surgery and it almost delayed shooting because it was a nightmare to me, because I couldn't deal with the thought of not getting there on time. So with the travel, and surgery and prep for the show -- it was hell."

Uhm. I had to have surgery to have my wisdom teeth out and it was the first surgery I'd ever had. Guess what? I didn't wind up crazy as a result of it. I had to get up the next day and go cover the governor's inauguration. My dad had to drive me because I was so doped up on pain pills, and yet still, somehow, I didn't go crazy.

And what's more, I had my surgery done in Mississippi. So if I can find a just find oral surgeon to do my wisdom teeth extraction in Mississippi on a newspaper reporter's insurance, how, for the love of God, did a celebrity with money not find someone to do an equally good job in Los Angeles?

All of this leads me to only one conclusion: drugs/eating disorder. The same reasons celebrities ALWAYS go to hospitals despite their pleas of fatigue, or whatever else. She should have gone with fatigue as her excuse in fact. It wouldn't have sounded nearly as dumb as, "I had to be locked up in a mental hospital due to having my wisdom teeth removed." Seriously?!

Surfing is so uncool

Today I learned no one calls it "surfing" the Web any more. They say browsing. Of course, I've never actually heard anyone say "I've been browsing the Web all day." But I guess everyone I know and talk to is just uncool. Sad.

To call or not to call?

This is a new dilemma for job seekers. Back in the day when I was fresh out of college and desperately seeking any job that would get me the hell out of Greenville, Mississippi, I would call editors all day long trying to get a job — making sure they got my resumes, seeing if they needed anything else, just checking in, etc. That was part of the game. That was part of the job, to be honest, so part of getting the job was to prove you would be relentless in the pursuit of the job to thus prove you'd be relentless in the pursuit of the story.

But now we're in the age of e-mail and Facebook and LinkedIn...and Twittering, I guess. And job listings are all: NO CALLS. I saw one editor who was blogging about the process of hiring an assistant editor who wrote, "The quickest way to get your resume tossed in garbage is to call when the job clearly says, 'No calls.'"

Also, now that I've worked as an editor, I know how annoying those calls are, especially when you're trying to get all your daily work done and get the paper out. The last thing you want to do is spend even 10 minutes on the phone with a job seeker. I think this has probably also changed since I graduated from college. When I graduated I was mostly talking to people whose primary job was handling job seekers. Not H.R. people, mind you, but editors whose job it was to seek out and develop talent for their newsrooms. But with 10 years of layoffs between now and then, I don't think those people exist any more — except maybe at the highest echelons of newspapers (New York Times, Washington Post). And where they do exist, they have about 200 more duties than they used to. So they're busy writing editorials or overseeing the paper's social media endeavors.

I've been pondering all of this over the last few days as I've wrestled with whether to call or not to call regarding a job at the Chicago RedEye that I applied for. I've applied for quite a few jobs since my position was eliminated, but this is the one I've actually wanted. It's a job I have the experience to do, it's in the city I want to live and it seems like a fun place to work — if any print media place can be fun to work at in these trying times.

Last night my boyfriend brought it up. He's squarely on the side of calling. His thinking is, if you don't call you're mostly like not going to get it anyway. How many hundreds of resumes do you think they got for this job? So how's it going to hurt if you DO call. At least you'll stick out in their minds and not everyone is going to consider calling when a job says not to call a reason to toss a resume in a garbage. Most of the time that stuff is posted by H.R. anyway, and the real managers don't mind a call — not to that degree. So what do you have to lose?

After pondering the questions today, I came to the conclusion that I should call. But I'm going to call on Friday. RedEye publishes Monday through Friday, so they're unlikely to be terribly busy on Friday. Of course, they may not even be in the office on Friday. (a.m. NewYork — a similar local product that I interviewed at last year only staffs Sunday through Thursday.) But if no one's there on Friday, I figure I can either leave a message or call back on Monday. The BF is right. What do I have to lose?

Random E-mail #1

Lately I've been all these random e-mails. Not spam, but real e-mails to my yahoo account. Sometimes they're addressed to someone with my same name and sometimes to someone with a totally different name. This is the one I got today. It's totally random and even funnier because I didn't quit my job, but I am unemployed. At first I thought it was a joke from one of my friends, but then I realized 1. I don't know anyone with a kid named Parker and 2. I also don't know anyone named Scottie.


First off, I wanted to thank you for quitting your job to watch Parker everyday. That is a big sacrifice, and I am very appreciative. I hope you don't take anything I'm about to write defensively. There were some questions brought up by yesterday's events that I would like to ask you, and Scottie, and propose some solutions.

The events that took place last night, could've happened while I was watching Parker, so I hope you don't think I am blaming you or Scottie. But I am concerned by a few things.

1.) Parker needs to be on a regular and consistant feeding, and sleeping schedule. I can give you what my sister and I used this summer, which worked well for him. I think that would be a huge benefit to him. I am open to any suggestions you have, but would like to hear what his day is during the week.

2.) I am concerned that Parker was not fed dinner last night until 6pm. I understand the seizure took place, however he needs to be fed dinner before 6pm, every night. Parker eats a lot, as you have probably noticed and it worries me he is not being fed consistantly.

3.) I am also concerned I was not notified at 1pm, when him temperature read 101. I am also concerned that a Doctor was not called immediately. I am also concerned that no other fever reducing medicine was administered at anytime later that day. (to my knowledge).

4.) It also worries me that Parker was unsupervised at the time he collapsed. And, if he did have a fever that high, why it was undetected.

Again - please don't take these things defensively, I am not trying to attack anyone. These are questions I'm asking as a mother, who is very concerned for the well being of her son. I think if we can work together, it will be better for Parker.

We used this schedule regularly, everyday, and it works well.

Here is the schedule he was on during the days with Emily:

wake up 6 - 6:30am

eat breakfast 6:30 - 7am (usually consisting of a scrambled egg, cereal bar, toast, milk, banana)

play time 7:30am - 9:30am

morning nap 10am - 11am

lunch 12pm - 1pm (turkey, hot dog, cottage cheese, fruit, mac and cheese etc.)

play time/activity/walk/library/afternoon snack 1pm - 2pm

afternoon nap 2pm - 3pm (sometimes later)

play time 3pm - 5pm

dinner 5pm

bath time 7pm

bedtime 8pm

Movie Update

First off, I saw "District 9" last night. Best movie I've seen all year. Drop everything and go see it immediately. Not only does it involve aliens — which in and of itself should make you want to see it — it's an expertly done social commentary on man's cruelty in the name of science and the racism that seems inherent in all humans. The movie is set in Johannesburg and is shot like a documentary. The set up is that an alien spacecraft stalled out above Johannesburg in the 1980s and when humans finally were sent up to the ship, they found thousands of half-starved aliens, which were then relocated into a refugee camp in District 9 of the city. District 9 has become a slum and the people of Johannesburg hate the aliens and want them relocated. So a private company, whose primary business is weaponry, is hired to relocate the aliens in a camp to be called District 10 about 200 kilometers outside the city. And that's where the movie begins. It's impossible to do it justice in a paragraph. Go see it and tell me what you think. As a warning, my boyfriend hated it. He said it was the worst movie he's ever seen. Then again, his favorite movie is "Superbad." So maybe if you're a New York Italian dude who hates to read and just finished watching all five seasons of The Wire back-to-back, this movie isn't for you.

I also saw "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra" recently. Listen, I know it's getting a lot of bad reviews, but you gotta know what you're getting when you go in. I mean, this isn't Shakespeare, people. It's G.I. Joe — Yo Joe!s and all. I liked it. Everyone in my party liked it. We didn't love it. We didn't think it was the best movie of the year. We didn't think it should win all kinds of Academy Awards. But it was good. Some of the back stories were stupid. But everything with Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow was awesome, so if you see if for no other reason, see it for them. They could have used a few more fighting chicks, though — ones that didn't have a love story attached. As if women only go to war to find love.

Hudson Valley RidFest

The past weekend was also the Hudson Valley RibFest. Like the improv marathon, it also ran Friday through Sunday, which is the reason I didn't attend any improv on Saturday. I was BBQing it up at the RibFest.

Now, coming from Memphis, I'm a little bit of a barbecue snob and nothing at this RibFest changed my opinion of this style of cooking in the north. There were six vendors. We tried four or five of them. Only one had decent barbecue — Butch's Smack Your Lips BBQ. Another place, Big Moe's M&M Ribs, had great sauce, but their meat was dry. They, however, did have very good spicy mac and cheese. So points there.

It was a fun day, though, and there was a beer tent. So that made things better. There was live music — upbeat, cover music that people could dance to, but no one did. And there were plenty of bouncy things for kids because God forbid they hold an event up here and not have a bouncy house for the kids. There would be kid riots and nobody wants that. They're so little, they can kick your shins before you even know they are there. Dastardly children!

Initial Assessment

Today I had to present myself at the New York State Department of Labor office for my "Initial Assessment." This is done in a small group (mine had eight) and involves going over the paperwork that the state sent us about our special skills, work history and career goals.

My group had two people for whom English was not their first language — one woman came with her daughter, so she could sort things out for her. One man who looked like maybe he was laid off from the Abercrombie & Fitch catalogue and four others who maybe lost jobs at a construction site or hotel.

After we turned in our paperwork, we met individually with a...well, I guess they are some kind of career counselors, I'm not sure. My person was named Bridget.

Bridget took a look at me, looked at my paperwork, looked back at me and then said, "I'm so sorry about your job." She sounded so sincere. I said, "Yes. I'm sorry about my job too." And then she said, "I loved your column." So I guess she really was sorry I'd lost my job and not just saying that because she was trained to. Maybe I should have directed her to this blog. Anyway, she asked me where I was looking and I answered that I was looking mostly in New York City since that's where all the media jobs in this area were and out-of-state. While all the other counselors seemed annoyingly upbeat with their people, Bridget just seemed depressed — like our H.R. director was when she told me I was being let go. She told me, "Something will come along for you. I wish I could say how soon, but don't worry. Something will come along." Then she gave me a sheet with some job search sites and said, "You probably know all of these, but here you go;" added that my resume looked find and I was free to go.

Everyone else was still meeting with their counselors, so I guess they needed more pointers on where to look for jobs or what to put on their resumes. But for me, the whole thing lasted about 30 minutes. Of course, because it fell in the middle of the day, I've done absolutely nothing productive by way of job search. Oh well, better luck tomorrow.

Unemployment Update: Let the rejections begin

Number of weeks unemployed: 5
Number of resumes sent out: 31
Number of rejections: 2
Number of ever-so-slightly positive responses: 1

So I've officially been rejected, by automated e-mail, for two jobs to which I applied. One was a part-time position with Sirius XM radio in New York City. The other was for a public affairs specialist with the EPA in Annapolis. No surprise. Though I was told my resume did qualify for the job. However, I was not one of the three names that was passed along to the department head doing the hiring. Three names. Out of how many resumes? Probably hundreds. Can you imagine? What is also depressing is that all of these places are letting HR directors whittle down the resumes before they get passed along. Shouldn't be up to the person doing the hiring? Why am I bothering with creative cover letters when all the HR director is going to do is look at the resume and go to their check list of job criteria? And what's more, how is the HR director going to know that most good public affairs specialists were once journalists? They don't teach you that in HR school.

On the upside, I did get an actual e-mail from someone who told me to send some clips. Granted it's for a job opening that doesn't exist yet and one which they may never get to hire for, but then again it was a response, which was encouraging after so many months of nothing. (I'm counting all the job searching I did before I got laid off because I knew the lay off was inevitable.) Of course, it's also for a reporting position at a daily newspaper, so I guess I'm destined to work for newspapers until either they or I die. It's a toss up, which will come first.

Improv Marathon

This past weekend was the 11th Annual Del Close Marathon. For 54 hours, improv groups from around the country converged on three theaters in Chelsea for non-stop improving. And though I only went to a few shows on Friday and Sunday, I can tell you that there is a lot of bad improv in the world — almost all of it from Pennsylvania. There is also some very good improv, much of which comes from Chicago.

A festival such as this is not something I would normally attend. I like improv — when it doesn't suck (I'm talking to you Philadelphia) — but I don't have patience for too much of the same thing. Like, I would also never go to a Shakespeare festival or a documentary film festival, for example. But my friend Linus, who doesn't exactly live for improv, but at some point came very close and is now trying to recover, was in town from Chicago for the festival.

So the best of what I saw was:

Dummy: (As seen above) Jason Shotts and Colleen Doyle are a couple. They are also the longform improv duo named Dummy. With a combined seventeen-some-odd years improv experience and more than fifteen-aught months of roommate experience, prepare for things to get funny. And personal. And super gross. Jason Shotts has been a student/performer/teacher of improv for the last seven years. He has performed with such groups as iO’s Henrietta Pussycat, Willie Nelson Slept Here, Cougars, The Lindberg Babies 2.0, Brad Renfro and FELT. He has also performed at comedy festivals such as the Chicago Improv Festival, the Del Close Marathon, The Out of Bounds Festival, the i3 Raleigh Longform Improv Festival, the Dirty South Improv Festival, and Chicago Sketchfest with the ensembles Dummy, Sketchcore, BirdDog, OTIS and International Stinger. Colleen Doyle grew up in Cleveland, where she wrote greeting cards and performed with The Second City. Since moving to Chicago she has had the good fortune to write and co-star in Babymakers, play in Maine with ImprovAcadia, cavort on the high seas for Second City aboard the Norwegian Dawn, and make stuff up with the ensembles Chairs and Showpony. Currently she performs with Swanel at iO, as one half of Dummy, and as an understudy to The Second City National Touring Company.

iMusical: The Improvised Musical joins the unpredictable playfulness of comedic improvisation with the emotional power of musical theater. A cast of singer-improvisers creates a compelling new show with each performance, comprised of completely improvised scenes, lyrics and music, all inspired by a single audience suggestion. The Washington Post calls iMusical "spot on," and DCTheaterScene.com calls them "improv geniuses." They have performed to standing ovations at the Kennedy Center and comedy festivals from DC to NYC. Under the direction and accompaniment of Travis Ploeger, former longtime musical director of Chicago City Limits and co-creator of I Eat Pandas, iMusical explores the human condition via song and laughter... as only Washington Improv Theater can! www.iMusical.org

The worst was a duo called WhipSuit. I refuse to post their bio because they really hurt my insides with how bad they were. You can take a guess where they were from.

The last performance I saw was by Scheer-McBrayer, both of whom are on TV, making them some sort of improv royalty. But their performance was pretty flat. Their banter at the beginning was funny, but once they actually started performing, the funny seems to dry up — probably because of how unbelievably hot and stuffy the theater we were in was. This, of course, did not stop most people there from uproariously laughing at every other line. This is the benefit of being marginally famous — people laugh at you and pack the theater, no matter how bad you are. I mean, they were no WhipSuit, but then again very few are.

Rejection

Just received the following e-mail:

RE: Public Affairs Specialist, GS-1035-12/13, RTP-DE-2009-0199

Your application was tentatively qualified for the above referenced position; however your rating wasn't high enough to be evaluated for referral to the manager. Under the Delegated Examining process, three names may be referred for each grade level advertised.

Thank you for your interest in employment opportunities with the U. S. Environmental Protection Agency and encourage you to apply for other vacancies.

We wish you success in your employment efforts.

Who stands a chance in a system where only three names are evaluated by the manager? The federal government hiring system sucks. What does a computer, or even an HR specialist know about the skills a journalist brings to the position of public affairs? Nothing. This isn't like hiring a plumber. The managers should really be evaluating the candidates themselves.

More out of work journalist join already flooded market

The Journal News in Westchester County is about to layoff 50 people from its newsroom and is making everyone else reapply for their jobs. (We didn't even have 50 people in our newsroom.) Since the jobs are publicly listed, I guess, actually the number of people who lose their jobs could be much higher if they choose to hire outside of the paper. What bothers me — other than all these people losing their jobs — is that now I'll have even more competition for the precious few jobs that are out there. Awesome.

Unemployment Update: Still unemployed

Weeks out of work: 4
Number of resumes sent out in that time: 26
Number of responses: 0

So, it pretty much remains crickets out there when it comes to the old job search. I've not received one call or one e-mail, requesting more information, asking me to come in for an interview or even rejecting me. I actually WISH I could get a rejection notice because that would mean someone out there in the big ol' world is reading all these cover letters I'm writing or taking a glance at my resume.

The only think I AM getting are annoying e-mails from "human resource specialist" at a job search company saying, "After reviewing your resume online, we have found a receptionist position you may be interested in." Stupid Career Builder. You apply for a job through them and the whole world can see your resume, whether you want them to or not. That's why when I was employed, I could never apply for jobs through Career Builder — our executive editor would troll through the site looking for staffers who had applied for jobs and then making their lives living hell and/or lining them up for the next layoffs.

Speaking of Career Builder, apparently they seem to think the market is getting better. According to one of its surveys, almost half of workers laid off from full-time jobs in the last 12 months have found full-time work in the last three months. Wish I were amongst them.

At the drive-in

I went to a drive-in movie theatre for the first time in my life earlier this year. I remember they had one in Memphis when I lived there, but then I think they turned it into a farmer's market because no one would go. But on a Monday night, the theatre here was hopping. Granted, Monday night is discount night, and we were there to see "Funny People" — so that's probably a good combination for a crowd, but still I was impressed by the number of people.

I think part of the reason for its popularity this far north, is that you can actually go to the movie and not have to leave your car running with the air conditioner on. In fact, halfway through the movie, I had to get under a blanket, it was so chilly. Plus, while I got bit by a mosquito early on, I think there was just the one little guy doing all the work because I never got bit again and I had forgotten to bring bug spray.

The movie broadcasts over your car radio in a manner that I guess is similar to how the iTrip works for your iPod. You tune it into a station and that's that. Afterward my date asked me what I thought about the movie and I said I thought it was long (like most drive-ins, there was a double feature — the second film some movie I had never heard of by the guy who wrote "Little Miss Sunshine", but it was 11:30 p.m. at the intermission between the two films, so there was no way we were sticking around for that). Then my date said, "Let me ask you this: Was it better because we saw it at the drive-in?" And I said, "Definitely!"

Much like when I saw "Beowulf" in 3-D, this is a movie only worth seeing in the theater if there's an "experience" to be had along with it, because the movie on its on isn't going to be worth the price of admission. "Funny People" was too long, the characters not very deep or likable in anyway and all the Adam Sandler character learns from his near death experience, I guess, is how to be a friend...sort of, but not really. Like most movies that are TOOOOOO long, this one would have benefited from some cutting — like almost all of the stuff that goes on while they are upstate California at the "love interests" house, interacting with her kids. What WAS good about the movie is all the stand-up. They should have done more of that and just left the romance plot line out completely.

Wow. I've seen a lot of bad to mediocre movies this summer. Next up: "G.I. Joe."

The Government and You: Unemployment edition

So here's a fun fact. Though I've actually been unemployed for three weeks, to the state of New York, I've only been unemployed for one week...and they don't pay you for your first week of unemployment. It's officially known as the "waiting week".

Here's how the funness works:


Week one: Apply for unemployment. Wait.
Week two: File claim for week of unemployment. Wait.
Week three: Don't get paid for previous week of unemployment because it is the waiting week. File claim for week 2 of unemployment.
Week four: Get paid.

My head hurts with all the government math. Also, it took me from 11:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. before I could get anyone on the phone to explain the above to me. The system was so busy that it would just tell you no one was available, try back another day, and hang up on you. When I finally got through to the part where you wait for the representatives,I had about a 20 minute hold. Luckily my phone has speaker. Cindy was not very helpful and seemed to think it perfectly fine to blame everything on the "unusually high unemployment". I was thinking, "Why the hell is this moron employed and I am not?"

I've witnessed a lot of dysfunctional governments in my time (Louisiana state, Memphis city, Village of Memphis, Miss./Walls) but seriously, New York state is by far the worst. The worst. I wish I could give it a prize and I wish that prize could be a bloody revolution akin to what the French did to all their royalty.

Movie update

The ugly truth? Do not see "The Ugly Truth". Even looking at pretty Gerard Butler can't save that movie, which was badly, badly in need of a script editor. It also perpetuates the terribly misguided notion of what life as a journalist is about...except all the Red Bull drinking. That part is true.

Coming soon, my review of "Funny People" and also of some books I read.

Damn Dirty Machines

Applying for job has become such a soul-less affair. You sit in front of a computer and search for job listings. Then you apply online. There are specific directions not to call, least you be banned forever from ever working for that company. According to the automated response, due to the high volume of applications received for everything from coffee girl at the local hospital cafeteria to content creator at ESPN.com, no one will contact you unless your resume is somehow magically chosen. And now, NOW your resume isn't even viewed by humans any more. Computers look at the experience on your resume and see how it matches up with the job requirements. Can you believe that?

How is a computer going to understand that my decade of experience in the land of journalism is actually very good training for that job in the public affairs office at West Point. That in fact, yes, since I worked as an assigning editor, I do actually know what assigning editors are looking for in a press release in order to turn it into an actual story, in order to get that ink that you so desperately need to justify the entire existence of the public affairs department. That as someone who actually worked as a reporter, I know how important it is to get the releases to the right person and not just assume that someone who worked there five years ago is still at the paper. No. What the computer will see is that I've never worked as a public affairs officer before and therefore must have no idea how the job is done. But do you know who really has no idea how the job is done? Public affairs officers. Because they've NEVER ACTUALLY WORKED IN THE MEDIA AND THEREFORE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT CONSTITUTES A NEWS STORY!!!!

I did actually send my application in for the afore mentioned job at West Point (and ESPN.com — though haven't yet gotten desperate enough to apply for the coffee girl spot....I do like coffee, though). I'm now trying to work out exactly how to get that resume in front of an actual person. My dad had an idea that at first I though was dumb, but now I think might just be brilliant. He said I should write my U.S. Senator and Congressman — and write them all. The ones from New York AND the ones from Mississippi. And you know, he might be on to something. I mean, I don't think there's a snowballs chance in hell that Chuck Schumer or John Hall are going to call up West Point and say, "Hey will someone please just look at this girl's resume." But I do think the odds are fairly good that Thad Cochran might make a move in that direction. I mean, I'm not expecting him to get me a job at West Point, but the man forced the V.A. hospital to take my dad on as a patient after they had told him several times the waiting list was so long it'd be eight years before he might have a chance to get in. He is not above the minutia of his job. And he strikes me as just the type of person to be as pissed off as I am that a computer is picking who gets a job and who doesn't in the federal government.

Didn't we learn anything from "The Matrix," people? We can't let the machines win.

A day in the life of an unemployed journalist

9:15 a.m. Get up. Wander into kitchen. Make coffee. Feed pets. Take dog out to pee. Eat hot cereal even though its 85 degrees outside.

10:15 a.m. Check e-mail, newspapers, etc. Realize with a panic that somehow an hour has disappeared from her life. Give dog his pills.

11:15 a.m. Play tennis. Well, actually, hit the ball against a wall out on the tennis court because there is no one to play tennis with.

Noon: Fed up with playing tennis, retire back to apartment. Change into swim suit, go to pool

2 p.m. Take a shower. Eat lunch.

2:45 p.m. Finally sit down to do something to job search related.

6 p.m. Walk dog.

7 p.m. Wash dishes, fold clothes, do other miscellaneous household chores.

9 p.m. Eat dinner. Watch Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2. Complain about how it's not as good as the first one.

9:51 p.m. Write blog.

Sad isn't it.

Apartment blues

My roommate is moving out at the end of August. She's decided she's had enough of New York, long commutes, her ridiculously small salary, living in the living room and dealing with the crazy ex. And she misses her family. So she's quit her job and is planning to go to graduate school, like everyone else without a job in journalism. She seems pretty happy about her decision and I'm glad for her.

Now my problem is what to do. My unemployment is about $400 a week. The federal government takes out taxes, which seems ridiculous, but whatever. Plus I have to pay about $150 a month for COBRA. I'm estimating this will leave me with about $1,250 a month. My rent is $1,050 a month. My cell phone (I have no home phone) is about $100 a month. That leaves me $100 to pay for gas, electricity, internet, food, outstanding credit card bills, car insurance and any other unexpected costs. You don't have to be a math genius to figure out that's not going to work.

My lease, is through the end of April. So I went to find out what it would cost to get out of my lease, because if I don't get a job locally I'll have to move — either for a new job or in with my parents. These are my options: 1) find someone they approve of to sublease my apartment. They have to go through a background check and the apartment complex has to sign off on them, but they keep my security deposit and I'm ultimately responsible for the apartment and its rent or 2) use the "emergency exit" clause, which is a penalty of two months rent (I have about $3,000 in my savings account, so that would wipe that out), plus I have to give two months notice. How can anyone give two months notice when they get a new job in a new city? So if I were to give notice now, I couldn't move out until Nov. 1, plus I'd have to pay two months rent on top of that. What a scam...especially since the apartment complex is always claiming to have a waiting list for its apartments.

The Proposal

Funny. Go see it now, if you have any soul and a secret love of chick flicks.

I'm planning on seeing again with my roommate, who could use a little pick-me-up after she had to call the cops on her ex-boyfriend yesterday. He has been harassing her at work (she blocked him number from her cell and changed her e-mail account). She told him she never wanted to see him again. (Long story short: He cheated on her. She took him. He cheated on her with the same girl. She moved out. She took him back. He cheated on her with the same girl. He begged for yet another chance. While she was considering it, he had the other girl move in with him. She said she never wanted to see him again. Now he says he's changed and can't live without her AND — my favorite part — wants to help HER.) So he showed up at the train station and waited for her to get off. Then started begging her to take him back. When she reiterated how she didn't want to see him again. He started screaming, so she got in her car and drove home. He promptly followed her home. I had previously seen a police officer driving around our complex, so I went to look for him. But it turns out she had called the police and I bumped into a second police officer who was looking for our apartment.

He's been warned not to contact her again or they'll arrest him and he's too much of a wimp to try anything other than a few more e-mails. I'm not worried, though she is. She's all convinced he's going to come over with a shot gun that his dad owns. That, and every time we go somewhere she's looking for his red pickup truck...even when it's some places he's never ever been before and also not any place he would necessarily think to look for us (random deli stop). But I think she secretly likes the drama (which is why she kept making up excuses to get back into contact with him even after she declared she never wanted to hear from him again) and the attention is gets her. That might be a horrible thing to say, and she may not even realize that that's what she's doing, but she is the baby of her family. You know how youngest children are.

Anyway, that's all to say, see "The Proposal." It's very funny.

Update on Media Participation

Even before unemployment I had managed to up my movie intake, due primarily to my dating someone who was 1) unemployed and 2) lover of movies. We have very different tastes in movies. He likes chick flicks ("Devil Wears Prada" is his favorite), bro movies (what's that one with McLovin'? That's his second favorite movie of all time.) and mob movies (He was totally appalled that I hadn't seen "Goodfellas," which he has now remedied.) My favorite genres are foreign and independent films (or as he puts it, subtitle films) and sci fi. This has translated to me going to "The Hang Over" with him and his coming to see "Star Trek" with me.

So below is a summary of the movies I've seen in the last two months or so and a brief line on what I thought:

1. Harry Potter: I didn't read the books, but I have seen all the movies. This is the first one that hasn't felt like a completed movie. It seems entirely dependent on whatever comes next, which bothers me. I like, in a series, when a movie can stand on its own. Also WAY too long. They should have cut it from 2.5 hours to 2 hours.

2. Public Enemies: Again, way too long. The pacing was off and I kept thinking we were at the end, but we weren't. Johnny Depp and Christian Bale - pretty to look at; also very good acting. Marion Cotillard - also pretty to look at; wish I looked like her. Oh, and also very good acting, though her accent bothered me a little. There are a lot of other famous people scattered throughout the cast that you aren't expecting like Giovanni Ribisi, Billy Crudup and Leelee Sobieski. That guy from the first season of CSI: Miami and Diana Krall also make appearances. And Madison Dirks. He has a credited role. When did he start getting in movies?

3. The Hangover: Funnier than I expected; though as you might have guessed, most of the funnies bits were in the trailers and commercials.

4. Up: Probably the best of the movies I've seen this summer. We saw it in 3D, which everyone said was totally worth the extra money, but I wasn't all that impressed with the 3D. The previews for upcoming movies (the one where spaghetti falls from the sky and the one with the hamsters saving the world both look like they're going to be awesome in 3D). I think you'll be fine seeing this one in non-3D. But definitely see it.

5.Duplicity: I went to see this based solely on the fact that Clive Owen was in it and I saw him filming it at Grand Central. It was OK. Better than that other Clive Owen movie with Naomi Watts, which I saw based solely on the fact that Clive Owen was in it.

6. Star Trek: Awesome. The second best movie I've seen in the last two and half months. Even if you've never watched an episode of the Star Treks or seen any of the movies (like my date), you'll be able to follow this and, I think, like it. Of course, if you're a Star Trek fan, you'll like it even more.

7. Wolverine: Meh. You do get to see Hugh Jackman naked, though.

8. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past: WTF? A retelling of The Christmas Carol that was released in May? Who thought that was a brilliant marketing strategy? Who?

Today I'm off to see The Proposal. Look for another update on all the movies I've seen in July and the books I've FINALLY had time to read, soon.

Laid off, Lain off

I recently got laid off at work and then promptly went and spent a week lounging around the beaches of Puerto Rico (thus the lain part of this post). The vacation was planned pre-lay offs and happened two days before I was set to begin my week off. Upon my return, I signed up for unemployment. I could have done it while I was gone, but somehow that seemed very wrong.

Among the things I did for the newspaper as it's assistant local editor (what is known to the rest of the non-Gannett universe as an assistant city editor) was write a monthly column, which ran on Saturdays. My Saturday was up the week I got laid off. Because I had an idea it was coming, I actually wrote two columns: one, which would have run if by some miracle I was not laid off, and one, which was meant to be my last column. Neither ran.

But now, since I have time on my hand and no outlet for my creativity, I've decided to post my last two columns here and then maybe write up some other ones, which I had kicking around in my head, but didn't have the time to write. I will post the final column now. This will probably make no sense to most of you since you've never heard of these people. But some of it will still be funny, I think.

I'm beginning to think that getting laid off is a right of passage for people my age. As if Generation X should be renamed Generation Ex.

The number of people I know who have been laid off now seems roughly equal to the number of those who have not. And I have a feeling that the un- column will end up much longer than the employed one. We long ago gave up on the antiquated notion of "pensions" and "job security" and are starting to do the same with the numbers 401.

And so, as I prepare to join the un- column above, I thought, in this column, I'd share with you the Top Ten things you didn't know about the Poughkeepsie Journal.

10. We have the largest collection of captive monkeys in the entire world. Granted, they are monkeys of the plastic and stuffed variety (some also exist in plate and potato peeler form), but still it's one for the record books. And they all live on the desk of a certain local editor who shall remain nameless. (OK, it's Kevin Lenihan. Please send him all the monkeys you can, c/o the Poughkeepsie Journal, because he's going to need them to stave off loneliness once I'm gone... and he's going to have plenty of extra desk space to keep them on.)

9. The Culinary Institute of America wishes it had the cooking talent of the PoJo staff. All I can tell you is, people will attend the most mind numbingly dull meetings detailing the ins and outs of the new paper shredder if it means there will be brownies from Kevin, zucchini chocolate cake from Barbara or the crack known as rum cake from Kathleen. Seriously, people have come to blows over that rum cake.

8. We sometimes have bats in the newsroom. No. Really. Actual bats. The flying kind. And they are never, ever accompanied by Christian Bale — sadly. John Davis and I had to capture one in a box one Saturday because the entire staff was hold up in the men's bathroom and refused to come out. And since neither of us knew how to paginate, it was either gonna be the bat or a crash course in QuarkXpress. And the bat lost.

7. If you have watched the movies, "Sleepless in Seattle," "The Ring," "Message in a Bottle," "State of Play," or "All the President's Men" you have no idea what the modern American newsroom is like. (Though we do have a blonde on staff.)

6. If you have watched "The Paper," or the third season of "The Wire," ore read Dilbert, you do.

5. I have worked in a college cafeteria, a Wendy's in Baton Rouge, for the Maryland-National Capital Park Police and The Washington Times and never, NEVER in all that time have I seen a more disgusting refrigerator than the one on the third floor of the Journal. Last week I threw out some yogurt from 2006 and something that I believe began its life as a hot dog, but ended it all white and fuzzy. Someone should call Entergy. I think they could heat all of New York City on what's in that fridge.

4. Michael Valkys is the best reporter I've ever worked with. Period. (He's so good, I would have put an expletive between best and reporter, but this is a family paper.) For the last three years I've come in every day marveling at the fact he's still here, covering the town and city of Poughkeepsie — along with the occasional car show and gala — instead of working at the New York Times, where he belongs. Consider yourself lucky, Poughkeepsie. You and we don't deserve him.

3. The Advice Goddess, Kim Commando and that woman who writes the horoscopes do not work in our building. Please stop calling and asking for them.

2. Just because you own a bottle of Tabasco sauce and you dump it on some chicken or red beans or whatever, this does not make it "Cajun." (That actually has nothing at all to do with the Journal. It's just a pet peeve of mine and I thought I'd take advantage of the soap box before I have to pack it full of my books and leave.)

1. The most common second professions for laid off journalists are: teacher and lawyer. And we all know there are enough teachers and lawyers in the world. So, please, PLEASE, do us all a favor and buy a newspaper every day. If you keep a journalist employed, you might just prevent us all from living through a third-grade production of "Les Miserables" done completely in mime and the subsequent lawsuits from those forced to watch it that ensues. Trust me. No one wants that.

Snakes

I hate snakes. I hate them. I HATE them.

All snakes terrify me. Even dead ones. Even shed snake skin. Snakes and heights (or falling, I'm told) are my two greatest fears, and they are paralyzing kinds of fears. I see a snake and I freeze. I cannot move at all. I can't breath. And I certainly can't call for help.

So, of course, I live at Snake Central, where everyday is an adventure in "How many snakes will see on my walk today." At least here, the only snakes seem to be of the gartner snake variety, as opposed to my parents house where they are of the Amazon rain forest/rattlesnake/I will eat your baby for lunch kind of variety.

This summer a snake has moved into my complex. She/he lives below the steps to my apartment. She/he likes to come out during the day and sun her/himself in a little coil by the steps. At first, this terrified me. I was somehow convinced the snake would come into my apartment in the night, get into the bed with me and then slither all over my feet, at which point, I would quite literally DIE of fright. The snake has yet to do this. Instead, a curious thing has happened, I find myself checking in on the snake everyday. I look for it every time I go in and out of the apartment and I slowly realized that I am not afraid of this snake any more. I am not about to touch it as my neighbor was doing the other day. But I also feel a little bit protective of it.

Today I heard some of the guys, who are working on the apartment above mine, out front talking about killing a snake. Before I could yell out the window, "No. No. That's OUR snake." I heard what sounded like a shovel hitting pavement, some laughter and language I can't repeat here, and then a triumphant declaration that he snake was dead. I was heartbroken. Our snake was dead. Little Paulina is dead. (I don't know. The snake strikes me as a female, so I gave it a girl's name.) But then when I left for work today, I saw that the snake was curled up in little sun coil — warming herself as always, and I actually felt joy.

I'm still terrified of all other snakes and I have no idea why this snake has moved me so much. But if a snake and I can become friends, then who knows what will come next. World peace, anyone?

Chi-town

I just got back from a trip to Chicago, which I believe is my favorite city of all. If I had a job to go to, or were to lose my job tomorrow, I would pack up in an instance and move.

I can't exactly explain what it is I like about the city. It's more than just its art and atmosphere, and the fact that I have friends there. I feel some sort of connection with it that seems to reach into my subconscious. There are cities that do that. Places where you go, where you've never been before and yet you feel totally at home there. Chicago is one of those places. I felt that way the first time I went there and I feel it still.

New York is not one of those places. I have never felt at home there. I like it very much. I feel much more accustomed to its ways now. But I would also have no trouble leaving it.

Knock, knock: New neighbors calling with apple pie and a copy of the Watchtower

So, we have Jehovah's Witnesses in our basement.

Two sisters moved in not too long after I acquired a roommate and my stalker downstairs neighbor moved out. My roommate and I were confused at first by the nature of their relationship. Were they poor friends like us and oddly had a similar living situation? Did one girl sleep in the living room? We wondered if they were a lesbian couple or maybe only one lived there and the other was just over ALL THE TIME. But then recently we met their mother and it turns out, they're sisters. It also turns out that they spend their free time knocking on peoples doors with copies of The Watchtower tucked under their arms.

The news of the Jehovah's Witness infestation has been all the buzz at our complex. People are quietly upset because they all think there will now be constant knocking on our doors on the weekends. At first when one of my gossipy neighbors told me, I didn't believe it. The girls seemed too modern, their shorts too short. They had a Yorkie, for goodness sakes! But after talking to their mom, it turns out they are indeed Jehovah's Witnesses. They're from Virginia.

The only other Jehovah's Witness I actually know used to be one of my reporters and I was just as shocked to find out she was a JW as I was about these girls. The ex-reporter was also from the South, from South Carolina to be exact. I'm not sure what it is about the south that breads JWs, but I guess that's where most of them seem to come from. Of course, the ones who used to come to my door on Saturdays looked nothing like these girls. They tended to be frumpy middle-aged women in very sensible shoes. There was a certain look to them and the look did not say Gap.

I have to admit that I don't know much about JW except they don't celebrate birthdays or holidays and I feel they are a little cultish and that bothers me. It bothers me more when they seem so normal, like the girls in the basement or the ex-reporter. But I guess that may just add to the cultishness of it in the end. I mean, who would join a cult of middle-aged frump women? That would just be too sad for words.

Intrepid Sea-Air-Space Museum

So since I've moved here my brother has wanted to go to the Intrepid. I didn't find this out until after he left here the first time. Then he came around December with our cousin. And a big aircraft carrier is not her idea of fun. Especially since they do not sell fake Coach purses on it. Then the next couple of times, it was closed for repairs. But this time...THIS TIME...it was perfect. Almost like he had planned it because it was Fleet Week and that meant all kinds of extras going on. They just reopened the submarine, The Growler, AND there were navy dudes EVERYWHERE.

So here's the best advice I can give you about the Intrepid. And it is seriously good advice. If you want to go, buy your tickets in advance online. You have to do this at least a day before you want to go. But it will save you hours, HOURS waiting in line (or on line, as they say here). I always try to buy tickets in advance online. I did it for the Statue of Liberty when the afore mentioned cousin visited and it saved us a little line waiting, I guess, but we still did our fair share of standing. I expected something comparable — it would save us the time waiting in line to get tickets, but we'd still have to stand in line for the actual boat. But instead, it was like having a Do Not Pass Go card. But instead of going directly to jail, we went directly onto the Intrepid. We waited NOT at all. The only time wasted was trying to figure out where Will Call was, because we could not believe we could just walk up to the front. This line stretched around the block/pier. So, moral here, buy online ahead of time. Also, if you have a college ID, use it. Even if it's from the community college where you only took a Spanish class a semester. Saved me $5.

The boat was pretty interesting. We spent about four hours there, I think, and we still didn't see everything. Block out a day. Especially if you go during Fleet Week when the bands are playing and there is beer being sold and you can just kick back on a nice sunny day outside and listen to music with friends.

Oh, for those of you don't know what the Intrepid is: "In 1943, Intrepid was commissioned and served proudly in World War II. She went on to serve as one of the primary recovery vessels for NASA, three tours of duty off Vietnam, and submarine surveillance in the North Atlantic during the Cold War." It's now a museum.

What? June already!

Hi. Remember me? No, probably not. I just realized I made only one post in all of May and that was a lame shortie about the weather. How did all of May just go by without me realizing it. So let me catch you up.

Memorial Day:



My brother was in town. So me, my roommate and my brother on the spur of the moment dusted off the cooler, which hasn't been used since I left Memphis, dug out the beach towels and Frisbee and went and hung out at the Riverfront Park. It was beautiful weather. I only wish I had planned ahead and gotten, like, a hibachi or something, so we could have cooked out. Then I had to return my brother to the airport that evening. Surprisingly, we had no trouble with traffic.

Winter, redux

I woke up this morning and it was 39 degrees. Right now it's a balmy 59. I had to wear my winter coat and a knit hat when I walked the dog earlier. I'm not sure what the weather is trying to prove right now, but it's very much making me want to move back to a place where summer lasts six months out of the year, as opposed to the six weeks we'll be lucky to get this year.

Stupid New York weather.

Bronx Zoo

So a couple of weeks ago, on a pleasant day (ok it was the Western world's Easter), me and my roommate went to the Bronx Zoo...along with every Orthodox Jew in NYC. We assume they had the same idea that we did — with all the gentiles slung up in church, there wouldn't be big crowds at the zoo.

The zoo was awesome and though we spent four hours there we didn't see everything there was to see on the cheapest ticket you could buy ($15). My favorite parts were the seals, the penguin feeding and leopards playing.



The worst part by far was the polar bear exhibit. I felt so bad for that bear. He looked 100 years old and so sad and lonely laying on concrete by himself. A lot of the zoo has been updated for modern times to put the animals in more natural habitats. His, however, was really old school. It hurt my heart.


And made me especially fond of the Memphis Zoo, which is by far the best zoo I've ever been to. It's habitats are uber natural. And the polar bears in particular seem to be having an incredible time, frolicking around, swimming and charging the glass at little kids/lunch. Plus, Memphis has pandas. Real pandas...not the fake red ones.

Bucky abroad, Bucky hoping to still have a job

Sorry I've been long absent. I was on forced leave by my job — cost cutting measures; we were all required to take a week of unpaid "furlough" — and so I spent it on the couch of my friend who lives in England. This was surprisingly cheaper than you might think. The ticket wasn't much more than what I pay to visit my parents down south and I spent less than I would have if I were at home too.

So upon my return to work, I was told we were being forced to take a second week of furlough (in the second quarter) and they needed to know what week I was taking right away. (Those who make $90,000 and over must take two weeks. I, naturally, make nothing close to that.) I already had a week off for vacation so I just chose that week. We also found out that starting April 1 there will be no more raises, at least through March 31, 2010. My review and thus raise? In April.

Then yesterday we found out that we were being "hubbed" like the company has done to the New Jersey papers and our copy desk and graphics department would essentially be fired and the Journal News in Westchester County would pick up production. There will be a few "new" job openings down there that our people were "welcome" to apply for. Obviously there will be fewer jobs than we have people. That's all they know of for now, but if we go the way of Jersey, then apparently ALL the editing jobs will move to Westchester (including mine) and they'll eliminate the positions of executive editor and publisher at our paper. So essentially they're asking our publisher and editor to help bring to fruition a project that will eliminate their jobs.

For more on this delightful trend, visit the Gannett Blog. (Not affiliated with the company, much to its chagrin.)

Books: March edition

Books bought:
"Middlesex" by Jeffrey Eugenides
"Then We Came to the End" by Joshua Ferris
"Reading Lolita in Tehran" by Azar Nafisi
"Dreams from My Father" by Barack Obama
"Sense and Sensibility" by Jane Austen
"Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Austen

Books read:

Uh? Reading?

The problem with having a roommate who works part time at Barnes & Noble is the very tempting 30 percent discount. It makes you buy books even when you have so many unread ones you couldn't possibly read them all in the next five years — especially at the rate I read. My roommate, who also has an addiction to books, reads a ton of books. She tears through them to get to the end. Meanwhile, I wander slowly through mine, savoring the words. I actually read every word. I find it enjoyable, but frustrating because I can't read nearly as many books as I would like to.

This is why I've been reading my friend's copy of "Kavalier & Clay" since January. I also read every article in the weekly New York Magazine that I get and, of course, there's all that Spanish homework that isn't exactly reading itself. I'm also frustrated by my reading in foreign languages, as I've been reading "El Leon, la Bruja y el Ropero" for about two years and the first Harry Potter book in Greek for even longer. I'd like to finish both, so I could move on to Harry Potter book 2 in Greek and "El Amor en los Tiempos del Colera" in Spanish. But they just sit there mocking me.

I'm trying to make a little push here to do a whole lot of reading in a short period of time. I plan to finish "Kavalier & Clay" in the next two weeks, in time for my trip to England, where I can take two much smaller paper backs on the plane with me. I plan to finish both on the trip (I'm counting on the 8 hour flight to get me most of the way there — though of course I'll probably just watch movies. And then come home to start "The Brief and Wonderous Life of Oscar Wao" before moving on to a book my roommate would like me to read. (People are constantly loaning me books, which I always return....eventually.)

Of course April will just bring a lot more books I'll buy and won't get around to reading for another six years. Sigh. I think I have an illness.

Taxes!

New York State tax forms are the most confusing, convoluted piece of government form-ery ever created. Every year I finish my federal tax forms in no time. (I have no children, no alimony, no winnings from gambling or anything like that to complicated things — I have two incomes and an education credit and that's it.) Filled with a sense of accomplishment I rush over to complete the NY State tax form and am immediately stymied.

I mean, in what world is the federal tax form easier than a state tax form? This one, I guess.

We pause for a note on Bucky's Spanish class

I am now in Spanish 302. Once again it is three ridiculous hours on a Thursday night. And once again, it may be the worst class I've ever taken. This time there are only five of us in the class. Seven signed up and two dropped out after the first class. Two of the people were in the last class. One is an old Chinese woman who is a space cadet and has trouble understanding Spanish. And English. We have a new teacher. An adjunct. I don't know anything about his background, except that he is Cuban and he insists on speaking English. Only his English sucks. He uses words incorrectly. He told the class for our last test that there would be no cultural readings on the test, so no one studied them. Only what he meant to say was there WOULD be cultural readings on the test. The double negative strikes again. He's much easier to understand when he speaks Spanish. Only he won't speak Spanish.

When I speak Spanish, he says, "OK. Say it in English first and then we translate it to Spanish." So then I say it in English and he pauses and then says, "Oh. No. That was correct." And he'll move on to the next person. It's totally insane.

And though we've had a test and several homework assignments, we've yet to get a single grade back on anything he's given us, so no one has any friggin' idea how we're doing in class. Also every class, no matter what country is the topic of our lecture (Ecuador, Bolivia, Argentina), they all go back to the Cuban revolution. And Che. And the movie about Che.

This class is totally insane. And the only thing I can safely say I've learned in the five weeks or so that we've had class, is the personal "a". I'd never been introduced to that concept and now when to put that with the object of the verb makes a LOT more sense. So there's that. Not quite worth $400+, but it's something, I guess.

The Little Owl

On a recent Sunday I had brunch at a place in the West Village called The Little Owl. I was meeting someone for which there was the potential of playing, "Where do you want to eat?" "I don't know. Where do you want to eat?" For the better part of the morning. So instead I picked up New York Magazine, randomly picked this place out of the brunch offerings and said, "Let's go here. It sounds like it could be good." And it was.

It was tiny, of course. I think they have 10 tables and four bar stools. The kitchen looks like a closet and the prep room and lockers for staff are in the basement. On brunch mornings (weekends and they apparently do a popular President's Day brunch — who knew!) people start lining up outside about 30 minutes before it opens. I know this because I forgot what time they opened and got there earlier than I though I would. The person I was meeting was late. And so they wouldn't seat me until the "whole party arrived," which is understandable when you only have 10 tables and yet it was still annoying. They did however invite me to sit on this tiny elevated lounge area they had (hard to explain) in the corner where they kept the cell phone they use as a business phone and the laptop they use to play music for ambiance.

The music was great - as if they put my own iPod on shuffle. (There's music on their Web site, if you click on the link above. The music and Web site amused me for some reason.) And then they brought me coffee. For this I gave them major, major points, even as I secretly fumed that my brunchmate was 30 minutes late (that's about an hour I was waiting). He walked in right after a couple who took the last open table. So instead we crammed in with the two other people at the "bar". It turned out not to be so bad, though. One of the people left right after we sat down, so it turned out we had plenty of elbow room. Plus our coffee and water always stayed full.

The food was awesome as well. I had the fluffiest French toast ever with whipped cream and fruit and syrup. He had the applesmoked bacon (which apparently just tasted like regular bacon; minus points there) and pancakes. The menu also had heartier options for those who like their brunch to be more lunch and less br. The place was really adorable and I'd like to go back for brunch again and also to try their dinner menu. It looks good as well.

All in all, a happy happenstance find, The Little Owl.

American Museum of Natural History

Last week I finally went to the Natural History Museum. I think I went wrong somewhere in life because I'm obsessed with animals. I love visiting zoos and natural history museums and especially aquariums. I believe that I am actually part fish. (That said, I have I visited neither the Bronx Zoo nor the aquarium. I'm sure it will only take me another three years to get around to that.) I briefly flirted with the following professions in college: Marine Biologist, Archeologist, Astronomer. Seriously. I actually took 16 hours of astronomy before realizing the degree at my college was really just a physics degree with a little star gazing thrown in on the side. My college also didn't have an archeology degree. You had to study anthropology. But I digress.

Anyway, back to the Natural History Museum. This is not a place to visit if you don't have a lot of time. I had five hours and still only saw a tiny fraction of it. It is also an extremely confusing, sprawling place that at times makes no sense whatsoever. You wind up in places where it appears no one has been for many decades. This is what happens when you shun the maps and try to do things on your own. Finally, we went back to the front desk and picked up a map so that we could find the dinosaurs — because like every six year old in the world, I LOVE DINOSAURS. And I wasn't leaving without seeing them...or their bones, I guess would be the more appropriate wording. And in some cases their eggs.

It's ironic, I guess, that I love dinosaurs so much because my mom doesn't believe they ever existed. This is because there is no mention of dinosaurs in the Bible. I found this little fact out from my brother recently who told me my mom thinks people just stuck some old horse bones together to make them look like dinosaurs. I must admit, I was a little appalled.

So, in opposition to that, I give you even more dinosaur bones:

Ice, ice...you know

I may be an odd person for this, but I am captivated by the small, incongruous items of daily life. This results in my taking pictures of things no one else is looking at. The way a shadow makes bars on the ground, or wild flowers that in LSU colors, or most recently this arrangement of ice, which was created after several snows, some snow plowing, more snow, a warm day that partially melted the block, a little grit and then more freezing weather. I took a lot of photos. (The iPhone has allowed me to indulge this passion to a new degree. Before I didn't always have my camera with me and the one on my old phone was, I think, one of the first digital cameras ever inserted in a phone. It was really sad. I share with you only two because I know you all aren't as weird as me.



Sadly with the warm few days we've had recently, I imagine this little ice kingdom is no more.

Hello February

I have no excuse for my total lack of blogging. I mean, I do have excuses — work, too much time on Facebook, nothing to write about, no one reading this anyway, blah, blah, blah — but in the end I really have NO EXCUSE.

It's probably because this blog has no direction; it has no theme. Since I moved to New York, it has slightly more of a theme, in that I try to write about local things that may interest all of you back home (back at all my various homes), but I don't really do enough for this to provide a steady stream of information like a blog needs. But as the snow outside has thawed and we have at least a few warm days on the horizon, I hope that this will change someone and I'll get out more and I'll have more photos/stories to share. In the meantime, here's a cute guy for ya:



More soon.

Roomie

So I'm one week into a new experience known as Roommate in the Living Room. That's right, I have a roommate. I also have a one bedroom apartment. But in true New York style, we've managed to cram two people into what's meant to be a pad for one person, perhaps two if they are sleeping together like my neighbors across the hall who are married.

So we sort of used furniture to cordon off a portion of a living room as her "roomlet" as I call it. The other half is more of a traditional living room. See photos below:



We're in the market for a Japanese screen to act as a "door" to the roomlet. The hardest part is trying to find a place for all the stupid crap I've acquired over the years. Why do I have all this stuff? I've done a pretty phenomenal job, but there's still a small pile and I'm just out of space. That's it. I do not live in a TARDIS. I need to learn to throw things away. Rats are embarrassed by me. Seriously.

Mount Guilian (Washington slept here. Of course)

Roland and I walk here quite often. It's a beautiful, wooded area with a nice view of the Hudson River. Today, quite unexpectedly, we saw a doe and her fawn in the woods behind the house. I'd already put the iPhone away at that point and wasn't quick enough on the draw to snap a photo.

It's always weird to walk up on nature like that. I mean, we rounded the corner and there they were and all four of us just froze and stared at each other. I'm not sure who was more surprised the deer or me. Then the deer took off. Roland wanted very much to take off after them. Luckily he was on a leash. I have every confidence that mama deer would have kicked his playful little butt, otherwise.

So back to the house. Mount Guilian was originally built in 1730 by the Verplanck family of New York and was used a summer retreat and plantation. In late 1782 through the summer of 1783, Mount Gulian was the Continental Army headquarters of patriot General Fredrich Von Steuben. The house was expanded in the 1800s, burned down in 1931, then restored in 1976. Now they put on things like children's teas and host period games. Plus I think people rent it out for special occasions.